Words of Wisdom from a Child and some other thoughts

So I kind of have a tiny bit of a temper. OK, so I know some of you are thinking that this is an understatement but just go with me on this one. I have good intentions, I really do, but I try so hard to be the nice girl for so long until one day it just all blows up in somebody's face. Unfortunately, these days my poor children are the lucky ones who get to deal with the improper channeling of my emotions. But today was different. I had been praying all day long for patience and for the ability to react with calmness and it was working. I even called Jeff to tell him how good I was doing. But when I got up from feeding Lane on the couch and turned to walk into the kitchen and saw Cade with his hands in a big container of salsa (which was gotten out of the fridge by his older sister - unbeknownst to me) I kind of lost it for a second. He had been enjoying his snack for a few minutes already and had thrown salsa across the kitchen several times and it was all over 3 chairs, the table, the floor, part of the wall, and some blinds. I got a little upset with Maddie but then quickly regrouped and started cleaning it up. But then when I heard Cade screaming in the living room and turned to see Cole and Cade pushing each other, all the while being basically on top of Lane, I really lost it. It was not my proudest moment, that is for sure. I will spare you the details but when I realized my good day was quickly becoming a bad one, Cole & Cade were taken to their beds until "Mommy could calm down"and be rational. I went back into the kitchen to clean up and Mads came into the kitchen to help. By then, I felt really stupid for getting so upset about nothing. Maddie started talking to me and this is about how it went:

M: Mom, I'm sorry I got the salsa out.
Me: Well, it's OK if you want to eat salsa, I just want you to ask first. And then please put it away when you're finished.
M: I will. But ya know, it's not the end of the world. (mind you, I have said those words to her dozens of times)
Me: You're right, Madlyn. It isn't. Sometimes Mommy gets a little too upset about things.
M: It doesn't matter how big of a mistake you make, it's not the end of the world.

I immediately felt the truth of her words and I was so happy to think that maybe she was internalizing that concept and realizing that no matter what mistakes we make, it doesn't diminish our value as a person, and we can always repent. After that, I went and made my amends with the boys and recommitted myself to working hard to be a more patient wife and mother.

Also while we were cleaning, Lane started to get fussy. Madlyn asked me,

"Do you want me to help clean up or help take care of Lane?"

She is such an amazing girl and is always so willing to help out. I almost feel like I ask her to do too much because she will actually do it. The other day we were making homemade applesauce (after a few days of her asking to do it) and it was taking a while for me to get the apples peeled, cored, and sliced. She said,

"I'm sorry this is taking so long, Mom. I really don't want you to get exhausted."

We are so blessed to have such a special little girl and I definitely don't feel good enough to be her mother - maybe it should have been the other way around.

I am proud to say that I held my temper for the rest of the day and even bedtime was successful. Now all 4 kids are in peaceful slumber and life is looking good. Wish me luck for tomorrow!!