I've Been Thinking

A dangerous pasttime, I know. But it's one of the things I do best. So here are some of the things that have been going through my mind lately:

1. I love watching my children learn. It is so rewarding for me to watch Madlyn's manuscript improving every day as she practices writing more and more, and to listen to her read, and all the other fun stuff she's been learning. We have been practicing the letter sounds with Cole lately, especially the letter 'l' because he substitutes it with the letter 'w' sound, and he is finally getting it. Now he comes up to us and proudly says, 'Lincoln', or 'love', or anything that will show off his new skill. Cade is really learning to talk and it is absolutely amazing to me to hear him say new words every day. These young minds are so sharp and soak up learning like a sponge. Now if I were only a better mom and worked with them more...
2. I'm finally coming to the realization that there will be a baby at the end of this pregnancy and I'm excited. These past 8 months have been such a blur, I feel like it hasn't sunk in that we will actually be welcoming a new little guy into our family, but here he comes. I am feeling the usual discomfort that occurs at the end of a pregnancy but I do not feel rushed for him to come. (I think I've learned that they are more work once they come out...and I know that he won't stay in there forever, so what's the rush?) My only feelings of anxiousness stem from the fact that I am sick of worrying about him and not knowing for sure that he is healthy and sound. It will be good when he is born and we can see him and know. All of us are getting super excited to meet this little guy and put a name to his face!
3. Life is unpredictable and scary at times. As much as I would like to plan everything out, Plan A hardly ever happens. I'm learning to be flexible, prepare for the worst, and pray for the best. Through it all, I feel extremely blessed and lucky to have the husband and family that I have. I am often amazed at how much fun it is to plan and dream with my best friend and the one I love. So, even though it can be unpredictable and scary, life for me is happy and good.
   
4. It is very hard to be a perfect wife, mom, and homemaker. OK, so I am not professing in any way to be perfect but I must think that it is attainable because I keep trying to get there. And it's just not happening. I'm pretty sure I could spend my whole life taking care of the logistics of running my household (food, laundry, cleaning, bills, etc.) and never have any time for playing with the kids, working on church callings, having a hobby, exercising, spending time with Jeff, serving those around me, etc. Sometimes I feel like a hamster on his wheel, running and running but never getting anywhere. I'm trying to figure out some kind of balance before #4 comes and throws it all out of whack again. :)
5. I love being a domestic diva. Again, I'm not really proclaiming that I am one, but I sure like to try. It really makes me happy when I spend a day baking, cleaning, and doing other domestic duties. I know, I'm weird. Maybe someday I'll actually be good at it.